family part 2

Mischievous

It's too bad that you never felt you fit in with your family.

Other people felt the same way. I felt like I am a OUTSIDER - at home and school.


you'll change your mind about not wanting to ever see them again.

I really doubt it very much.

1999, Someone sent her a letter stating I died from AIDS. My mother found me at a shelter. I moved back home - the BIGGEST MISTAKE of my life.

Mom and sister WANTED me to take over my sister's old place with my mother. I didn't want to; I told them i was unhappy in texas this past TWO MONTHS.

They didn't listen to me at all; I signed the one year lease with mom - The SECOND mistake of my life. I felt like i was FORCE into signing it. One night, i ran away from home - without telling no one - back to Hollywierd. I didn't want them to CONTROL MY LIFE.

And u really thought that THOM BIERDZ have it bad! ROFL.


People change over time, & so do their opinions about things,

Not about my life! I am so estranged from them that I care less about them.

All I say that LIFE IS ONE BIG SOAP! We need to learn how to live with it and move on with our lives. I really need my art; it made me the person I am today. The art is my lifeline!

Charlee's email

Anxious

The following message was sent to you by CHARLEE while viewing your Member Profile:

If all that is true then it was really bad of you to do that! Why would you do it? Did someone do that to you and you did this in some sort of warped retalitation? Or is this scenario just something you know could happen to someone? I sure hope it's not true not just for him but for you also. HIV is a terrible disease. Down deep you know is a horrible thing to do to someone. Did you care about this person at all or were you just using him? If he thinks he gave it to you then why doesn't he want anything to do with you? Is it that he feels guilty? I know this is a lot of questions that are none of my business. I'm just trying to understand I suppose. As to telling him the truth...what would it accomplish? If you both have the disease then it would only make him hate you for sure! You sound almost like you want to hurt yourself as well as him. I really do pray that you both get better. A few people seem to beat the odds. Take care of yourself........charlee


I sent her an email right back. This is my response.....

thanx for a wonderful email.

u posted well tought questions

the main question i will answer - As to telling him the truth...what would it accomplish?

the only answer - Forgiveness starts with the one we hurt the most.

For me, i need his forgiveness to forgive myself.

it is very hard thou, knowing the damage i caused, in spite of the attempted murder

Honesty, i have to live with it every day of my life.

take care

have a nice week.

family

Chillin'

Did you grow up in a small town that you were so bored & felt you had to get away?

In a way, it was kinda like a small town. I never fit in at all. I had no place there.

My family really like it there, but I never did.

We moved there to be closer to my granny in 1977; my dad was killed in a truck accident in 1973.

Mom wanted her family around her.

U know us, kids - We had no choice at all. Mom uprooted the kids to the most boring town ever.


It's too bad that you've lost touch with your family.

not really.

For some, we can't go home again!

That is the God's honest truth!

I didn't felt like i was a part of the family; no structure.


Even though you don't choose to live where they live, you should at least try & keep in touch with them, unless they've done something to hurt you, & even then fences can still usually be mended if both sides are willing to forgive....

That life was THAT FAMILY is over with; I won't ever go back again.

It is just best to remain on my own and NEVER EVER cross path with any of them.

I truly felt like my mom wants to control me, but I can't handle that.

I need to live my own life - FAR AWAY IN ANOTHER CITY.

I wasn't happy at all.

Wade Robson

Loopy

Celeb choreographer Wade Robson, 21, told Sydney's Daily Telegraph newspaper that he visited Neverland Ranch when he was a kid and also slept in the same bed as the embattled singer. "But," he added, "nothing strange happened."

Hello, Wade! I will have to say this.......Dumb, stupid, idiotic, absurb, moronic.

In your own words, "Nothing strange happened."

Hmm, something STRANGE did happened.

Michael Jackson (adult) slept with you and other YOUNG KIDS!

That is beyond strange - it is sickening!

Did you sleep with your father in his bed?

My opinion - it wasn't right for a ADULT to sleep with young KIDS!

The kids have their own bed to sleep on.

Yet, Michael Jackson wants to sleep with kids.

That is sickening indeed!

Cracked Connie

Happy

Kacie Borrowman had big shoes to fill on Passions; in real life, Josh Ryan Evans (Timmy) died from a heart attack on the same day that Timmy died.

Most people really thought Connie was Timmy's replacement on the soap. Nobody really like that. We all want Timmy back! Tabby and Timmy belonged together. Timmy had a special place in Tabby's heart just like his fans.

"I thought it was in distaste to bring them on so shortly after the loss of Timmy :("

I felt the same way, Timmy was a great character.

Suddenly, we have TWO NEW living dolls - Cracked Connie and Cecil.

I learned that Connie was already planned before Timmy's death.

It such an relief to learn that. I have newfound respect for Connie.

Maybe, Connie should come back for a little while.

It was unfortunate that Timmy/Josh died when he did.

Having Connie come on that time MAKES SENCE!

Josh won't be on Passions for THREE months after his heart operation.

Therefore, TPTB created Connie to fill the living doll void till our favourite TIMMY comes back to Passionsl.

If people knew that in the beginning, We will accept The CONNIE DOLL!

34th Birthday

Happy

My 34th birthday was only "another day." I don't do holidays or birthdays! I just stay home and relax, no celebration whatsoever. I will talk about what matters to me the most!

The View announced that Elisabeth Hasselbeck, who finished fourth on Survivor: The Australian Outback in spring 2001, replaced Lisa Ling.

Young & Restless - Phyllis revealed her feelings to her ex husband, Danny, who noticed the change in her. Her life changed alot and came in a full circle - a son! Chris had a talk with Michael about the illegal business dealings with Victor, but he remained mum. Then she waited for Victor to came back on his trip; she wants the truth from him.

Bold & Beautiful - Brooke told Ridge about Sally's blackmail. Sally confronted Brooke about her secret. Ridge put Sally in her place - he already know. Bridget comforted Deacon, who was had by her father, Eric. Bridget/Deacon kissed on the bed; Eric didn't like that one bit.

Oprah's Favourite Things was pretty exciting. The audience applauded the first five minutes; they were awestruck by all the gifts. One black lady almost passed out; she cried too much. Oprah comforted her, "it's all good." That could be my real BIRTHDAY!

I forgot to put the tape in for the Joe Millionaire finale! Oops, I was 20 minutes late. I already know who he picked. It was so easy to find out on the web! LOL.

I watched the special edition of Fear Factor; family. the kids was awesome during on the gross stunts with their parents. all kids were winners in my book. At the end, it was girls vs. boys. I was shocked that the girls won and had the best time! The team they beat won a trip in an earlier stunt.

Country singer Glen Campbell was taken into custody Monday on suspicion of drunken driving after he left the scene of a minor vehicle accident, police said.

The death of 27-year-old actor Jonathan Brandis, who starred in two seasons of Steven Spielberg's "SeaQuest DSV," was a suicide, the county coroner's office said Monday. Brandis, who died Nov. 12, hung himself, the coroner said.

Michael Jackson's offical statement about the child molestion was posted on mjnews.

We can switch cell phone companies with the same cell phone number. I may switch from Sprint PSC next year.

The Change

Worried

The Change
by Kazz Falcon

I noticed a change in me.
So far, no one see it,
I felt it changing my mind too
I couldn't describe it yet.
ONly I know it would get worse later
It reminds me of the street people.
Their minds couldn't be reach within.
I looked out of the window wherever I go.
my mind wandered throughout the fields,
into a deep long lasting mind fracture!
I couldn't keep concertrate on things
let alone people talking to me too.
I speak out of content
Only wondered what I become of the change!

The Couch

Sad

Yesterday, my neighbor asked me if I wanted to buy his couch for $20. He mentioned that the day before. I told him I have to think about it. I hardly have any room in my place. I lived in a single apartment.

He finally showed me the white leather couch. It was nice and comfortable. I can't do anything at all. I was in the middle of something - baking cupcakes and my friends was coming over for the night. Once again, I need to think about it. Peter/Brian came over at the right time. I mentioned the couch. They thought I should get it. Hmm, then where to put the couch?

We rearranged the place - the round table was in the corner, the book shelf was in the middle of the window and the chair was by the dresser. I decided to measure the couch to be sure it will fit. Brian wanted to come along. I brought along some cupcakes. I promised he can have some.

We went upstairs. The guy wasn't there. I told him that I want to measure the couch. The other guy said "The lady's father just brought the couch. Didn't he tell you?" Hell, no! I was disappointed. I wanted a couch for a while, I still want one. Some day, another chance will come a knocking. The thing is that guy should have tell me in the beginning that someone brought the couch. No, he waited till I found out on my own. Drats! Oh well! I had a feeling that couch was stolen. A white leather couch for $20. That' odd.

11/21/03, Friday

Loopy

This morning, I woke up feeling crappy. I didn't feel like to do anything today. It was one of those days that I want to be fully refresh. I watched TV for a little while. Reigs/Kelly had the second Annual Hunkiest Husband Contest. I got bored after thirty minutes. They went all out on the contest; all the men was handsome. There wasn't an Average Joe in sight! Then I watch Good Day Live; it was mostly about Michael Jackson. I was quickly bored with it.

I remembered I need to pick up a package from the post office; they left a note few days ago. I tried out my new CD walkman. I put it in the front pocket of the new bag I brought few weeks ago. I was planing to walk. I changed my mind; I wasn't in the mood or the best shape of me life. I stood on the bus playing the gameboy.

I knew it; my new movies was there! I was glad I brought the bag with me; I didn't want to carry them in my backpack. I went to the next door and put the movies in the bag. There was some people on the sidewalk. I didn't trust them. I tore the address from the box and put it in the bag. They won't know where I live. I didn't wait for the bus. I walked home. My left foot was hurting; I walked slanted on the way home. I need to see the doctor about my foot; better yet, my health.

I watched my soaps; the scenes with Victor Newman and his long lost dad was fabulous. Both actors did a fantastic job. Victor didn't want nothing from him; he just put the old man in his place that family mean everything to him. Nick felt sorry for his daddy; I bet he have some regrets about turning him in for illegal business. Oh well! The Newmans will never be the same.

I watched Passions for a short time. I was so bored with the soap; I switched over to General Hospital. Sonny was expecting Carly home; but she want to her new lover's place instead. Nicolas and his girlfriend was trapped in a room with a bomb. Some guy raced to save them, but the bomb exploded!

This guy knocked on the door. I didn't answer; I wanted to watch South Park. After the movie, I noticed I don't have cable! THANK GOD! I still won't pay the bill; no cable box. I fixed the TV. I found out I can watch my British comedies on Saturdays! In the past, I didn't get them

MTA bus

Ecstatic

Finally, it felt so good to take the buses again! No more five DASH buses and TWO hours to the post office. I know that lots of people was tired from the bus strikes. We need to get up early and waited for the crowded DASH to come along. Most times, the DASH was pack; the bus driver wouldn't pick up any more people from the stops.

I took my normal bus to the post office. The 304 is the express bus on Santa Monica Blvd; it only stops at the main streets - Vermont, Western, Vine, Highland, La Brea and so forth. Damn, I had lots of mail. I haven't check my mail since last week. It was a good thing I put in a change of address on my weekly magazines. I will change the address again in two months.

Michael Jackson

Loopy

Well, Michael Jackson was in trouble with the law once again! The police raided Neverland in the morning on the charges of child molestion again! Boy, history repeats itself. The same thing happen ten years ago.

I will never forget this day at all; the raid was on my oldest sister's birthday. I forgot how old she is. I don't keep in touch with any family. That life was over.

Who ever thought Michael will be in trouble for the same thing? This time, the law is different; it got alot tougher concerning molestion. The boy saw an shrink about Michael; the shrink told the police.

For sure, the case wouldn't die anytime soon. As big Michael Jackson is, it will be a hot topic for months to come. The world would be watching his every move.

Don't forget...........Michael's new CD is out today!

Mario/Luigi

Silly

I was so sick of the news about Michael Jackson. It was on the news all day. I didn't want to stay home for that. I watched the soaps, some of it; the news kept on interupted the soaps.

I was anxious to ride the bus somewhere! I believed the new Mario/Luigi game was out today. I went to Circuit City on the bus. Man, there was few people on the bus. I wasn't suprised; not everyone trust MTA.

Circuit City changed big time; they switched the place around. The games is in the backl they were by the front. I saw the game guide for Mario/Luigi! Yes, I really need that guide! hehe. I didn't see the game anywhere. I asked the worker. He mentioned to look on the shelves! Hello, I did!

I didn't want to leave empty handed! I ended up buy some games for Gamecube. I asked the cashier, "When does the new Mario'Luigi game come out?" She didn't have any ideal. I thought I read it right on the web; it was out already.

I went straight home and played the games. I really like the new games - Lord Of The Rings. I brought the game guide for that game too. These days, we need the guide to learn how to beat the games! I got more memory for the Gamecube; I know I will need it!

I checked Nintendo web site again; the game came out on November 17. I was right. I noticed the new Mario/Donkey Kong game; no details was out. I wondered what the game was about. It should be quite good. Mario/Donkey Kong haven't been in the same game since the 1980's minus the racing games. Maybe, DK wanted revenge on Mario!

The Michael Jackson news didn't die down. It was a good thing I brought the games. I need to tune the news out for a while. We can take so much news.

My Dead Son

Sad

My Dead Son
By Kazz Falcon

My dead son
I heard a shot in his bedroom
I ran as fast I could
I saw blood running down on his forehead
It was too late to save him; he lost lots of blood
I noticed a poem on his bed
"My Great Belief" was frightening enough
He struggled with his sexuality and his belief in God
He must have use all his strength to fight it
He wanted to please his father
He loved God with all his heart
He couldn't be both - Gay and a Christian
Why couldn't he come to me?
I would have help him in any way
He should talk to me
Then again, my Christian beliefs was different from his
It was between God and him, not the three of us
He didn't find the answers he needed from the bible
The gun defeated my dead son


Copyright ©2003 Kazz Falcon

My Great Belief

Sad

My Great Belief
Kazz Falcon

My great belief
I believed in God with all my heart
I struggled with something heavy
It was so heavy that I couldn't do anything
Wouldn't you know it?
I prayed to God daily to get the burden of my chest
So far, nothing has happen
The craving was still there
Why can't I stop those feelings?
Those feelings couldn't be right
It put up a mighty fight
The flesh eats away at my soul
I felt like God abandoned me, I was so alone
He left me for being gay
I must do right in God's eyes
I need to end it for once and for all
I couldn't find any answers in the bible
The gun defeated my great belief


Copyright ©2003 Kazz Falcon

Average Joe

Chillin'

Tonight's Average Joe revealed the latest twist of being average! Throw some HUNKS into the mix and see what guy the girl (Melena) will drool over!

The show started on three groups of two guys competing for a date with Melena for that one night. At the end, three were let go from Average Joe.

Kathy Griffith, oh I love her, explained the game will be change forever with the twist.

Ladies and gentlemen, the HUNK from the first episode is the latest twist along with two other HUNKS! I wasn't suprised by the twist at all. The first hunk was writing on the wall; I knew he will be a twist somehow on the reality show.

Of course, the average Joes doesn't like the twist one damn bit! They knew they won't have a chance against the HUNKS! Everyone will pick the HUNK no matter what. I know I will! lol

I like Average Joe; give this show a chance. You won't regret the Average Joe!

BTW, Average Joe have it own message boards. I wished the other NBC shows get their own boards soon.

MTA Bus Strike

Happy

MTA bus strike is FINALLY over after 35 days.

It was about time too!

I was so damn tired taking the DASH buses to my destinations.

We must give lots of credit to DASH for the hard work.

Without DASH, we won't be able to go to any places.

It took me FIVE DASH buses over TWO HOURS to the post office both ways!

You could imagine how tire I was each time I go out.

Attention: We can ride FREE till November 22, Saturday and our OCTOBER bus passes is good in December.

MTA begins limited bus service last Monday. The full service will be ready by this Thursday.

I have no ideal what buses are limited; MTA haven't put it on the web site.

Stepping Stones

Happy

Stepping Stones
by Kazz Falcon

Stepping Stones
Each stone represent how far I came
Teach me about life
I reached for the next stone
Nothing happen
Something crossed my mind
I can’t leave this stone
I must conquer it on my own
I trusted the stone,
Floating on the water
The next stone, I moved up in life
Each one after that,
Growing to be a better person
I glowed into a light
A shinning light I can be proud
I fought to be on the next one
I lost sight of things
And fell into the water
Every stone disappeared
I reappeared on the same one I started on
By chance, I don’t have to start at the first one
I learned from my mistakes
And earned the stepping stones again


Copyright ©2003 Kazz Falcon

Yesterday/Today

Happy

Yesterday afternoon, The Raven's post gave me an excellant ideal, an ideal may get me in deep trouble. My forever obession may lives on! LOL

I wrote an letter to some old friends, Frank and Kevin, but they won't recognise me. Oh well, that 's fine and dandy. It needs some mystery to the assorted deed!

Evening, Mike dropped by for a while; he wanted to go online. He mentioned he will find out about his HIV test this sunday at the sex club, Slammers. He doesn't like that place. Me either! I have never been! Zone is much my style. I heard Slammers was disgusting. I mentioned that Mike can be tested at Melrose Spa too.

Since Mike and me was close; I showed him the "shocking" letter. Believe me, Mike was beyond shock! He wondered if I came inside. Of course! Miguel and I never use condoms; bareback all the way since the day we met at the bath house, Melrose Spa. We have never talk about HIV either.

This afternoon, I walked to the post office and mail off the letter to my friends in Texas. I wanted to send one to Miguel's sister. For sure, his family will be angry! I will do that later. I want to see if the two friends get my letter. If not, his sister is the next to go.

I changed my mind of going to Vons; there was lots of strikers out. I will get the bread some other time. I didn't want to face the strikers. I wasn't up to them. Yeah, I was running low on the food. Some friend could take me shopping this weekend.

I just went home and watched Passions. Grace finally made her choice after two years; she finally picked her first hubby, David! It was about time. Everyone was sick of the storyline. It should have ended long time ago! Anthonio pondered to his mother about Luis/Sheridan of being lovers behind his back. He asked his mother, Pilar, about those two. Luis showed up and will tell him about their past. Then....we need to wait till Monday for the cliffhanger! ROFL

I haven't watch Days Of Our Lives yet. Tomorrow will do. I was no hurry to watch Days. Friday's, I will watch the episodes during the weekend. I was meaning to wathc Days today but I kept on watching tv shows like The Golden Girls, King Of The Kill, Married With Children, The Simpsons and others.

Raven

Mischievous

Raven responded to The Attempted Murder in the Gay Life forum. He was pretty upset!


1122.2 in reply to 1122.1

"A year and a half ago, I had a lover.

Wonderful, red haired, freckled, smiling and caring man.

A year and a half ago, he died of HIV complications. I'd do anything to get him back.

To think that you knowingly gave this to someone fills me with a hate so black it burns in it's intensity.

I hope you go to a special hell."


I replied back to his post, the best I know how - DEFENSE!

"I'm not the ONLY ONE who does it.

We do have BAREBACK sex everywhere.

Anything goes at the bath houses and sex clubs.

We are already in the special hell.

Earth is one hell I will love to leave!

Raven, at least, the police can't do anything about the attempted murder!"


My replied to him was the most honest truth! Hear that, Raven? People won't stop doing unsafe sex; it was nature of the human flesh.

Attempted Murder?

Sad

Attempted Murder?

I was in an relationship.

I didn't tell him that I was HIV +.

Later on in the relationship, he found out that he was HIV +.

He told me and wanted me to get tested.

A week later, I lied to him saying I took an test which turned out to be HIV +

To this day, he doesn't know that I gave him HIV.

Some people truly believed it was ATTEMPTED MURDER!

I will like to tell him THE TRUTH, but he wants no part of me

Nov 11, 2003, Tues

Happy

I arrived at the post office in West Hollywood by the gay clubs. I didn't know that the post office was closed today. Also, I didn't know today was a holiday, Veteran's Day. I hardly keep up with the holidays; it was just a day for me. Veteran's Day doesn't mean anything to me nor some holidays!

I was mad at myself. I felt like I wasted the morning on the FIVE buses on a TWO HOUR trip! Miguel called me at the post office; he wanted a big favor from me. He need $200; Olga' family was coming down for the day from Whittier. They will eat at California Pizza Place at Hollywood/Highland mall. Miguel really need the money to show them a good time.

He went to the bank on Sunset/Vine; he didn't know the bank or the public places was closed. He did the next best thing; he called me for the money. I mentioned I was at the post office. He wanted to meet him at Hollywood/Highland. I will take the bus. NOT! He demanded me to take a taxi; he will pay for it! Hello, how could he pay? He don't have any money. He was waiting for me.

Well, I decided to take the bus, but I didn't meet him at all. I wasn't comfortable of giving him the money. I waited for the bus at the hospital near the mall. I just wanted to be alone and didn't want to give him the money. After a while, I went to Barnes & Noble at The Grove. I didn't want to ran into him.

Miguel called me couple more times, but I didn't answer the phone. I knew he will be angry at all. It seems like old times - he got himself in a pickle and I need to bail him out. I don't want to be bother with him concerning about any money. He can be angry at me; I really don't care at all. An hour later, it was time to go home.

I got off Sunset/Highland, then I caught the next bus to Hollywood/Vine and finally home. I was glad I didn't ran into him. It will be a while I won't hear from him.

He was pretty mad for failing him! Hey, it wasn't my damn problem!

Miguel

Happy

Miguel called me this evening; he can't get a hold of his sister for tomorrow's lunch date at Hollywood/Highland - Tony was online. I mentioned I will get my mail in the morning. He wanted to see me for lunch. He called me back again - the lunch date was STILL on for his sister and him. Oh well!

He brought up the letter I mailed to his sister earlier this year. I mentioned it was in the past. Miguel shouldn't be worry about the letter or Olga. We grown alot since then and time healed all wounds. He told me that Olga asked him if the letter was true. How could come answer a question like that? It was out of the left field!

It looked like I was a bad guy in their eyes! I really don't care. It doesn't matter one bit at all. I won't defend myself for the letter; the past belonged in the past. It was water under the bridge. Miguel and I was friends; that's what counts the most.

Nov 10, 2003, Mon

Happy

I woke up about 7 AM. An hour later, Brian was the next to get up, then Peter, who want some loving from Brian in bed. They fell back to sleep for a while. Peter took a shower; Brian signed up for classes online. I noticed the phone message - Miguel called me at 2:45 AM. I answered the phone about 8 AM - Miguel wondered about our plans. I mentioned that some friends were over and I will probably be there when they both leave.

I wondered about their plans - Brian heads over to his mother's for his classes and Peter was free today. Brian stayed with his mom for collage during the strike; Brian hated staying at his mom's . Her roomie is an alcoholic. I offered Peter to spend another night without Brian. I won't be here - I probably spend the night with Miguel.

I got dressed, then I realized they will eat at McDonald's. I stayed behind to take a shower and shaved while listened to Madonna. Upstairs neighbor stopped by to use the phone - he mentioned that he already received an eviction noitce from them. Damn, they act too fast. He didn't pay his rent this month. Last friday, someone stole money, wallet and backpack when he had a seizure! That sux! Brian/Peter came back.

Peter went online about the cable tv - some other company is doing the cable deal for my apartment building. I have to talk to the landlord about canceling the cable. I haven't recieve the cable box, nor I paid my bills yet! They promised us a special cable package. So far, they broke the promise!

Miguel called again; we can do it some other time. I have friends over; u know the good host! He sounded disappointed. I was too. I hoped we could spend the day together. Brian noticed I was depressed; I didn't want him to worry. Of course, I lied that everything is fine. Brian left for his mom's about 2:30. A while later, Peter wanted my house key; I wasn't going with him to the library. I gave him my spare. He took another shower; he doesn't want to spend the night with me! Peter went home.

Nov 9, 2003, Sunday

Happy

I played some video games till Mike called me about a train show in Pasadena. I told him that I need to call Brian/Peter. There was no answer at all. I called Mike back on the phone. He asked, "Would I wait for them?" I mentioned no way! They will come in the evening time. I didn't want to wait all day for them to show up. They may not show up afterall.

Mike was on his way; I had a few mintues to get ready. He came soon after. We took the oldest highway to Pasadena. He have been working too hard at work since the bus strike. He was doing more work during the strike. He wants things to get back to normal. I don't blame him at all. One time, he worked on the buses in the cold rain! Damn, I would have work the buses when it stop raining.

We parked in the parking lot; $7 for 16 hours was a good deal. He paid my way; they stamp a green star on our right hand. I haven't never saw so many train in one place before. It was my first train show! I mentioned to Mike that we should go to a toy show, he will have fun there too. I know I will! He brought a train over $100. Thanx God I wasn't a train nut! I just can't afford it, only the video games! Mike knows the trains pretty well in LA - he knows everything about the trains!

We went to the back where everyone was playing with their trains. SOme of them was pretty big. After a while, my ears was arching; the noises was too loud! We had a nice time. He asked me if I want to go home. Nah, I can go to Target with him. We got off the wrong exit, we took the street the rest of the way. We ate at Panda Express first; we were hungry. I took off the teeth to eat; it was hard to eat. We went to Target for a while. He got a DVD for his niece- she was getting married. I brought another gameboy advance with E Reader. I brought Pacman World 2 and Luigi's Mansion. He dropped me off at home. An hour later, Peter/Brian shows up to spend the night with me. We talked, played games and watched our favourite show, Queer As Folks!

Nov 6, 2003, Thurs

Happy

Today was the day I finally see the dentist! I can't wait to get the teeth! Last month, the teeth was to small. Hopefully, I will get them! I supposed to get the teeth last year, but the damn doctor at APLA dentist NEVER EVER hook me up; he was so lazy - meaning he didn't do his damn job! I should give him a hard time.

I lefted my place about 8:30 AM. I didn't want to be late AND I have some errands. I got off Rampart to 6th/Vermont to Wilshire/Western. I went to the bank, then I headed to the check cashing place. I tried to pay the gas bill, but they don't do the gas bills, only the DWP. I filled out the money orders.

I saw a guy put a for sale sign on his car for $3,000. Well, I don't have that kind of money. I played Connect Four till the bus came. I got off Santa Monica and walked to the dentist. She saw me thirty minutes later. She wondered if I lost the teeth. Hello, she told me to come back, the teeth didn't fit! I put them in. Presto, they fits! I lefted the dentist

I called Taylor; his phone was disconnected. I figured he didn't pay his bill; he doesn't have a job. I walked up to Hollywood/Vine to wait for the bus. I called Robert; we talked for a while - Sean doesn't live with him anymore - he was going from place to place; Mike is trying to take care of his grown sister as parent and a friend - his sister never party; Taylor has a new phone number - his ex partner kept on harrassing him; Robert didn't give me his new number. Robert mostly stayed home since the bus strike. He wondered about my teeth. I mentioned I got them today. He was happy for me. He does understands me quite well; I figured my speech was worse, thanx to the teeth.

I got off the bus at 3rd/Western to mail the bills. I walked two blocks. I saw the bus coming and ran across the street. I went to Walgreens for press compact, Mountain Dew and two cupcakes. Eating with the teeth was hard. I will take them out to eat! I went home, tired from the long walk - Rampart to MacArthur Park to home!