2001 Sept 15, Saturday

We went to the post office and almost ran over a guy on Beverly/San Vincente. He noticed the guy first in the back seat. I was in such a dazed that I didn't saw him to walk off the curb. I have enough time and space to avoid him! This past week has been heavily on my mind! I couldn't think str8! Thursday night mostly got to me. I was less concerned about Tuesday's tragedies, but Tuesday entered in my mind. It almost cost someone his life! Both of them affected me, I didn't lose anyone in the tragedy. My family lives in boring Texas. I hope I lost someone on Tuesday. I could have used that to get away from my turmoil life! I really need some time away from Miguel!

His work called for a party tonight. From the looks of things, he didn't learn from Thursday night! I looked up for an address. He got ready to work. I read SOD and Entertainment Weekly in bed. He brought up his car. I decided to give him his keys. He was quite surprised. He searched in my nightstand for his glasses. I told him that I only have the car keys. I gave him my car key; his was at the club!

In the last paragraph, I mentioned he didn't learn a thing from Thursday night. He seemed that nothing happened and went back to his daily routine. He wipes it out from his mind. He was also happy that his work put him on as a BARTENDER at the party tonight! Whoa!!! I supposed to forget about it too. I think not! He can't go on ruins lives at any cost! I won't be a part of his drinking abusive terror!! Once again, he came home with alcohol breath!

The miserable life of Steve continues on till I go the way of Anne Heche or find a peaceful time away from Miguel! It is affecting my mental state and well being.